Saturday, September 20, 2008

Life is way too short to waste trying to think of titles.

I'm so sick of being lonely. I'm even more sick of not having guy friends. I've been a tom boy for most of my life and I'm dying having to talk to all girls. Well except for maybe Lexi, and Lindsay. But at least they lift me up intellectually. I still wish I had some sort of athletic outlet other than dance and volleyball one day a week is just not enough. I wish I were still younger. Things were so much easier back then. Life back then consisted of jumping on a skateboard and risking my life as I dropped into a half pipe, or having huge water fights inside the house and rushing to clean it up so Mom wouldn't find out. I miss being able to say anything without feeling stupid about it. I hate growing up. THe rest of the world is completely organized and I'm still lost when it comes to real life. I guess that's why I'm writing a book. Even a fake world is better than this one. I was braver when I was younger too. My fear drove me to quit gymnastics. I wish I could go back. I miss gymnastics a lot. I miss truly living instead of trying to pass it by. I hate that everyone is pushing me to be someone else. I liked who I used to be.

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